Servant Leadership

Earlier this football season, I put up a post about Pete Carroll, USC's charismatic football coach, and how he kept his team loose before their big game against Ohio State.

Well, it appears he does some other things that many don't know about which also help him in his ability to be a great leader. He is a servant of others. Tim Moore from the Audience Development Group, wrote the following piece that I hope you find as interesting as I did:

It's eight at night. A reporter from LA Magazine is camped in Pete Carroll's office; the apex of Trojan football legacy on the USC campus. Suddenly Carroll ends the dialog and says, "I have to be somewhere." The writer asks if he can come along but is summarily refused.

"Absolutely not," says Carroll. The reporter asks again. With the critical eye of Joe Stalin, Carroll hesitates, acquiesces, and tells the writer he'd better change apparel. The USC coach rummages through a closet and flings a polo at the writer like a dished-off shovel pass. "Put this on," he says. The reporter asks, "How come?" Carroll tells the reporter that he might get shot wearing the bright blue. From there the writer struggles to keep up: an animated walk across campus to a waiting van, then to South Central Los Angeles. He tells J.R. Moehringer, now riding shotgun, to lose his notebook. There will be no quotations or formal written summary as it might make the people they'll be talking to anxious.

First stop, a group of guys on the street: maybe stoned, maybe drunk and possibly armed but to a person, stunned at who is approaching them. Carroll shakes hands, starts talking about football and the tension in the air falls away. They talk about their lives, the police, and other things...a car pulls up. Someone's mother, back from the store. Pete Carroll waves then helps her with groceries, carrying multiple bags. This can't be, she thinks; coach of the tightest, toughest, hippest college football team in the nation, a late night bag-boy? The scene is repeated with several other stops with similar reaction from stunned partisans of the night, until sometime after midnight they head for the obscure van and back to campus.

Carroll explains he feels this ritual is important, necessary in fact, to let these people know someone cares about them and has them in mind. He has found jobs for at least 40 men in these neighborhoods. On this night an emotional young man who thanks Carroll for coming out, places a bracelet on the coach's wrist; something he made and a symbol of solidarity.

Carroll admits few USC fans know of this routine. His wife, Glena, laughs and admits it worried her in earlier times, but not now. She tells LA Magazine writer J. R. Moehringer she's okay with it but drew the line on Baghdad.

If you're a UCLA or Cal fan, you've probably already made up your mind about Pete Carroll and the USC Trojans: arrogant, almost always a notch better, and so damn loose and cocky on the sidelines. If, however, you're ever invited on one of Carroll's after dark recon missions, you might just accept the premise that things are seldom as they appear. Pete Carroll defies the odds on and off the field, just as his boyish never-change-looks defy time. He keeps fun in the game and his players loose and unafraid. Once a card-carrying member of the NFL, he was only a number. Upon becoming the main man of Troy, Carroll became one the most prolific people in all of sports, and Trojan dominance of college football is evidence.

For those of us reaching for significance as leaders in a relatively short life, we'd do well to ask to ride shotgun in South Central Los Angeles with Carroll some night. If not, as an option spend 3 hours watching a Southern Cal game as Carroll strides the sideline in high animation, grinning ear-to-ear, patting players on the shoulders, having the time of his life. That's leadership. That's fun.

How Can I Forgive?

Yesterday, I wrote about a story that Ed Laymance included in his eBook, Not Against Flesh and Blood, which showed how forgiving others can give us true freedom.

So how can you do this, especially if someone has hurt you deeply?

Laymance gives the following steps in his book:

1. Begin by asking God to bring to mind anyone you need to forgive. Ask yourself, "Is there anyone, living or dead that I feel owes me something? Am I holding a grudge or bitterness against someone? do I carry disappointment with me? Is there anyone, living or dead, who hurt me or harmed me and I'm wearing that hurt?"

2. On a pad of paper make a list of the names God brings to mind. Don't be surprised if your name is on the list. You may be carrying guilt or shame for something you allowed. Don't be surprised if God's name is on the list. You may be confused, angry, or hurt that God allowed bad things to happen to you or someone you love. After five to ten minutes, you will have a list.

3. Tear off that page and set it aside. Start with any name on your list and put that name at the top of a clean sheet of paper. Then ask God to show you what it is about this person that you need to release.

4. Write down everything that comes to mind. This is not a novel, so you need not start at the beginning of the relationship and work forward. One thought will connect with another. Write what comes. Use words, phrases, paragraphs, and symbols--however you want to do this. This is for no one's eyes but yours, so be brutally honest. Hold nothing back.

5. some of what you write will be connected to other people on your list. Just make a note by their name; you will add this to their list later. Keep on task with one person at a time.

6. This is pretty emotional stuff, so you will need to take an occasional break. Take a walk, blow your nose, hit a pillow, get a drink--but stay with it until you feel you are done.

7. What you're going to do next may seem silly or stupid. do it anyway. This is a very important step. Make sure you are alone and no one can hear you. Imagine the person you've been writing about is sitting in a chair close by. You need to stand, so you can walk around. I want you to see yourself as a judge. What you have written is a list of indictments against that person. As judge, read out loud everything you've written; with whatever emotions you feel; using whatever words and volume you need to use. This is "no holds barred", "up close and personal", "in the face", "full force"! Don't be "Christian" or "appropriate". Let 'em have it! Include any additional things that come to mind. Say exactly what you feel.

8. Some of what you've written only needs to be said once. Some of what you've written needs to be said more than once. Say what you've written until it no longer needs to be said--a hundred times if necessary. One of the reasons you've been carrying this stuff is because it needed to be said, and you needed hear yourself say it - without debate, rebuttal, excuse, or explanation from the one who hurt you.

9. When you get to the last word on the last page, having expressed all emotions you needed to express, as judge, declare out loud, "Guilty as charged!"

10. Then as judge, declare out loud, "Case dismissed!"

11. Next, pray, "Holy Father, I do not feel like dismissing this (because you don't!), but I don't want to be controlled by this way any longer. I choose to forgive and release it to you. I choose to "flush". Now, help me walk away from how I feel and enjoy the sweet smell of freedom! Amen."

12. Destroy what you've written as a physical representation to yourself that the case has been dismissed. Dig a hole and bury it, burn it, shred it, whatever feels good. One person I helped said when they were finished with everyone on their list, in addition to destroying what they had written, they wrote each name on an individual sheet of toilet paper and flushed each one. What a great idea!

13. Repeat this process until you have an "emotional funeral" for everyone on your list. Don't stop until you have flushed everything. One inch of raw sewage in the house is better than six inches, but the house still stinks!

Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us.

Luke 11:4

Forgive and be Free

I am reading an interesting e-Book written by Ed Laymance titled, Not Against Flesh and Blood.

In one section of the book he reminds the reader of the importance of forgiving others. This is a story he told which illustrates this principle very well:

A woman was abducted, raped, robbed, shot and left for dead. When the abductor shot her he put a gun to her head intending instant death. She jerked at the last moment. The bullet went sideways. He ran off and was never found. She survived the attach and endured months of surgeries and rehab.

She was interviewed by a reporter about three to four years after the attach. In the middle of the interview the reporter commented how she must really hate the man that put her through all this. Her response was, "I once did, but not any more." When the reporter asked for an explanation she replied, "For a long time I was consumed with revenge and justice. I wanted him caught. I wanted him to endure all the pain and suffering he had inflicted on me. I could think of nothing else. Them one day it occurred to me. That man robbed me of one night of my life. I decided I was not going to give him one more day!"

What great words! We must remember, unforgiveness can fester inside of us and actually cause us to be ill. When we forgive, we are actually setting ourselves free!

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

Matthew 6:14

I Hate My Job!

I received this article in an email the other day from my friend, Doug Spada, president of WorkLife, an incredible organization which helps the local church to connect the dots when it comes to faith in the workplace. If you have ever hated your job, this is for you:

The American Workplace Survey, conducted by Harris Interactive this month found that almost half (48%) of workers are not satisfied with the relationship they have with their boss, and the majority (59%) of workers are not satisfied with the level of support they receive from their colleagues. Seventy-seven percent are not satisfied with the strategy and vision of the company and its leadership. Click here for full article.

Even in these challenging time where having a job is a blessing, a recent survey of a major municipality's employees reflected that more than 60% were unhappy in their work. One employee was quoted, "I feel miserable. My morale is lower than it's ever been. It has been difficult to even come to work." Click for survey results. (2009 Employee Morale Survey - Baltimore Dept of Public Works)

I am quite certain that some of you have a job you really hate. If you could, you would quit tomorrow but you feel like you're in a prison because you need this job, you've got time invested in it, you're not sure you could find another one, but you hate your job. If you're having those kinds of problems, I strongly urge you to read on because the Bible has some good ideas for you.

As I travel around the country talking to people, it seems to me that more people are discontent with their jobs than ever before. Undoubtedly the economic climate has a lot to do with that, since jobs are difficult to find and many feel trapped in their jobs. Also, workloads seem to be much higher, and the loyalty between employees and employers seems much lower. So, if you find yourself in a job you really don't like, you've got company.

I can understand your feelings, because I've had a job or two like that myself. But the Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians:...I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation....I can do everything through him who gives me strength (Phil. 4:11-13).

So, I want to talk about how to be content in a job you hate. You know, when you and I learn this secret of being content, as Paul learned it, we can't lose because our fulfillment and satisfaction are not based on circumstances - not based on whether we have a terrific job that we love, or one that we hate!

Keep in mind that Paul had to learn this technique of being content, and so do you and I. So, are you willing to enroll in Contentment 101, and learn how to be content in your job? That's where it begins. If you're not willing to learn to be content, of course, you never will learn it.

If you insist on saying, "I hate this job, I refuse to change my attitude toward this job, I could never be content with this job and furthermore I don't want to be content with it," then you've already prevented God from changing you and giving you a new heart and a new attitude.

First of all, you have to give up your rights. Most of us think things like, "I don't deserve this job," or "I deserve to have a fulfilling job," or "It's not right that I have to work at a job that doesn't utilize my talents," or "I can't be expected to endure the kind of treatment I get on my job." That's just our normal selfish nature, which has been fed and fired up by our humanistic society, teaching us "We have our rights."

Dear friend, if you want to be a contented person, you must first of all tell God that you recognize you have no rights to all that you think you have a right to. If you're a child of God, you belong to Him and He is the Master. Are you willing to give up your "rights" to have the job you want, and to allow yourself to be contented where you are? That is step one in being content in a job you hate.

Maybe you're thinking, "Well, why would God punish me with a job like this?" Let me assure you that God is not trying to make your life miserable. Just the opposite - He has plans for you that are good. But He can't work those plans for you until you surrender your rights to Him. Most of the time God does not deliver us from difficult situations until we have learned to be content and to accept them. That is how we learn to trust God and have faith in Him, and without faith it's impossible to please God.

So, step one in being content in a job you hate is to give up your rights for the perfect job and tell God you are willing to stay there and give Him control.

Encouragement

"You can be better than me." Those were the words of former Ohio State quarterback and Heisman Trophy winner Troy Smith to current Buckeye quarterback, Terrelle Pryor.

In a nice article in the Toledo Blade last Friday, it was revealed that Smith has reached out to the young Pryor to help him to deal with his many critics. Two weeks prior, Terrelle had turned the ball over four times in an upset loss to the Purdue Boilermakers and he was the subject of much criticism in Columbus and beyond.

In reading the article, it sounded like Pryor is very appreciative of the kind words of Smith. Based on his solid performance one game later against the Minnesota Golden Gophers, Smith's words might have been just what Pryor needed.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up.

1 Thessalonians 5:11a

Cut From The Team

My 13 year-old son, Robbie spent the past two afternoons sweating with 51 other 8th grade boys trying out for their school's basketball team. I was able to watch the last half hour of both days of tryouts.

It quickly became apparent to me that Robbie would not be making the team. Many of the kids were well ahead of him in their ability and knowledge of the game.

As I watched him though, I was impressed, because he gave it everything he had. He probably knew that he was not going to make it. However, he was running hard and making great V-cuts (a move used to get open on offense). These were things that most of the other kids were not doing.

In spite of his efforts, Robbie did not make the team.

However, I am extremely proud of my son. He tried. And he tried with all his heart. What more can you ask for?

I am also proud of the way he handled hearing the news that he would not be on the team. When I asked him what his thoughts were, he replied, "I'm disappointed but I'll just have to try again next year."

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Colossians 3:23-24

Axioms for Life

I just finished watching the above movie. I have seen this before but, for some reason, I liked it more this time than ever before. Maybe it was because I didn't feel rushed while watching it and I could really think about what was being said.

Included in this short movie are some really good quotes and axioms for life. Do yourself a favor and invest three and a half minutes in this.